Revisiting Mahabharat

I am absolutely hopeless when it comes to religion, mythology and knowledge about our scriptures such as Ramayana and Mahabharata. Though my GK sucks in general, but I am completely clueless about the things I have mentioned above. I used to see both these programmes when they used to come on the television (and when I was a child), but as I have mentioned in my posts before, my retention power is extremely weak.

I was chatting to one of my closest friends from my MBA school today. He had written a poem on Mahabharata and its characters. He asked me to read it. I am splitting the poem into parts, and below that are the excerpts from our chat (it is in hinglish and being the lazy bum that I am, have made no effort whatsoever to translate the parts in hindi to english. So apologies to those uninitiated in the mother tongue) which are relevant to that particular stanza from the poem.

THE MAIN CHARACTERS/AN OLD STORY

The crown prince was most just and righteous
Always knew his right from wrong
Always willing to protect and
Shield the weak from the strong
He loved his games of dice though
This blameless servant of the law
He lost his kingdom and his loved ones
Gambling was his greatest flaw

Me: ok let me guess
crown prince kaun tha? arjun?

Friend: abe ...yudhishtir
useless
angrez

Me: yudhishtir was arjun's bro na?

Friend: yah

The evil cousin was most ruthless
In his dealings most unfair
Wouldn't see reason and the kingdom
With his cousins would not share
He brought much sorrow to his kinsmen
In his pursuit of the throne
His greed resulted in much misery
Which generations would bemoan

Me: evil cousin was that jackass na ...bloody whats his name....jisne saari haran kiya tha draupadi ka

Friend: nahin ...duryodhan
vastraharan dushhasan nein kiya thha

Me: duryodhan? he was arjun/yudhishtir's cousin?

Friend: yah

Me: ye dushhasan kaun tha?
oh ho...mahabharat is so confusing

Friend: duryodhan ka bhai

The able archer was a champion
And an asset to his side
With his arrows he'd bring victory
And to his teachers much pride
He was guided by his charioteer
Friend and teacher, sharp and wise
Who taught him not to shirk his duty
And to each occassion rise

Me: able archer was arjun?

Friend: yahj

Me: thank god...ek to theek hua

The old king was a helpless man
His son's fault he could never see
The statesman that his kingdom needed
He could never ever be
The loving father of a bad son
Must have been a sorry sight
He could not reason with his son
He could not stop the coming fight

Me: old king was dhritrashtra?

Friend: yah

Me: wohoooo

Friend: excellent

Mocked and taunted and discouraged
Son of a humble charioteer
He proved his worth with bow and arrow
To his foes he brought much fear
They knew they could not defeat him
If the fight was straight and fair
The loyal friend and generous warrior
Died with a chariot to repair

Me: ye son of humble charioteer kaun tha....abhimanyu?

Friend: karn

Me: ye kaun?

Friend: karn...jisko kunti abandon kar deti hai jab voh chhota thha aur he is brought up by a charioteer's family

Me: and kunti was dhrit's wife?

Friend: abe nahin..mother

Me: so bheeshm pitamah's wife?

Friend: ooooh
nahin...bhjism pitahmah was her usband's grand uncle

Me: baap re...what confusion man....yucks...

The princess grew up in her palace
In the lap of luxory
With her husbands' great misfortunes
She would struggle happily
She was sarcastic and insulted
The son of the humble charioteer
And sought revenge from those who wronged her
Honour to her was most dear

Me: achcha who was the princess?

draupadi?

Friend: yah
wonderful
you can do it

The evil prince's evil uncle
Was a very evil man
To place his nephew on the throne
He hatched a very evil plan
To sieze the kingship with deceipt
His nephew he would instigate
This evil genius would deliver
the kingdom to its sorry fate

Me: evil uncle was shakuni?

Friend: zigackilllyt
yes

And did you hear of the other archer
Champion he could have become
Unfair was the person who
snatched his dreams and sought his thumb
Sad was the moment when he
Was excluded from the race
Centuries later in a great country
He would sieze his rightful place

Me: able archer who? kisi ka to angootha maanga tha kisi ne gurudakshina mein...now i cant remember the name of that guy....

Friend: eklavya
he didnt belong to the upper castes

Me: haaaaaaaaaaaan.....eklavya
i think i wud have to revisit mahabharat
sometimes i mix ramayan and mahabharat ke characters
achcha who were the 5 pandavs...arjun, yudhishtir, and who else?

Me: ok bhim nakul and sahadev....saw on wiki...but i thought nakul and sahadev were in ramayan? damn...

Friend: nakula and sahdev were their half brothers

Me: to ramayana mein bhi to 5 log the na?

Friend: i give up
chhod..

Me: bata na..ramayan mein 5 log nahin the?

Friend: tu western civilization ko belong karta hai

Me: nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Friend: iliad or odyssey ko jaake pad...bye for now

Me: :(((((((((((((.....bbye

Needless to say am feeling extremely dumb. So this weekend's mission is to brush up my knowledge on Ramayana and Mahabharata (and to do grocery shopping and to cook food and to clean up my pigsty and to get a haircut and to sleep).

And forgot to mention, my friend has written an amazing poem. This guy became my closest friend when I was doing my MBA, and still continues to be one of my best friends. He is a walking-talking encyclopedia, reads 5-7 newspapers everyday (which includes The Dawn - the leading Pakistani newspaper), knows everything about everything, yet is extremely humble and very down to earth. Have learnt a lot from him, and hope it continues in the future.